Why cant you see the pain you cause?

You left, but the door has always been left open

Hoping you would return to the loving arms.

I know life hasn’t been easy, and that the bond we have hasn’t always been what it was

but please don’t leave me,

you made a promise that you would stay.

if that is all you ever keep, keep that promise to me.

But i cant make your decisions, neither can your family.

honestly only you can pick yourself up.

no matter how much others try to help you. it comes down to you. and your choice.

what is a sister, you ask?

I could have answered that maybe four years ago.

I use to believe so strongly in our bond, but blood isnt everything.

One cut and its easy to let it all go and forget about life.

you have always been the attention, competative, the center, all revolving around you.

You are selfish instead of selfless. Its hard being selfless especially when everyone else around is being selfish too.

you are the one person that causes so much pain.

and the worst is we cant even talk about it, and it hurts me. it hurts my family. it hurts YOUR family.

but what is family?

its just what you make it.

what have you made it?


The Girl Missing Pieces

I took you to my secret place.

Far away, a haven from the storms.

My place no one else knew about.

But you convinced me to share it with you,

“Trust me, it will be okay. I promise.”

I believed you.

I open the gate to my garden

And as we walk through,

You are struck by my secret place,

You gape at the beauty within my walls.


The trees whisper out to me

“don’t show him anymore/he will be a lost piece/ you will lose this place/”

My brain chose to ignore but my heart knew the trees where right.

We walk further, coming to sit together on the swing.

you gape at the beauty within my walls.


The wind howls out to me over the steady trees steady whispering,

“Throw Caution”

Swinging gently back and forth, we stare out into the night.

I turn to look at you,

to engrave this moment for forever.


“Listen” I say as I open my palm to greet your hand as I grasp it to mine.

The bench swing weeps reach my ears as our hands meet,

I feel you jerk and almost pull away because you weren’t expecting

what I shared with you.

I opened your eyes and ears to my secret place’s real beauty the voices of the garden around us. You were able to hear the winds howl, the trees whisper and the swings weeping as it gently sways us.


You look at me with a smile that tore my heart to shreds,

you pull back from me taking my place with you.

I can no longer hear the swings cries, the wind is no longer howling in my ears.

I let go of my place, so that you can have this special piece of me.

I trust you, to care for it.

But you stand with the piece of me in your hand,

walking away from me, with no words to why.


You turn to look at me,

really see me one last time, you close the gate.

You let go of the piece of me,

and my tree whispers out on last time “why did you let us go/ he isn’t worth all you will suffer”

I run out the of the gate to look for my lost piece, but just as I go to grab it

the piece begins to fade, and I turn back to watch my secret place dissolve into the night.

Wishing I could take it all back, if only I had listened.